BIG TRAK (US) or Bigtrak (Europe) was a computerised toy vehicle created by Milton Bradley in 1979. This six-wheeled tank-like monster came with attractive decals, a front-mounted blue photon beam headlamp, and an integrated programmable keypad that remembered up to 16 commands which it then executed in sequence.
Wooof just came flying into the scanning room in a state of panic.
“What’s the trouble?” I said.
“I accidently messed up the settings on our new time machine,” replied the cat. “We have less than six minutes before time splits into two, erases our recent posts, and the bailiffs come to take our scanner! In addition to this, we’ll be talking in spoonerisms and nonsense.”
“Bloody hell Wooof,” I said. “We already talk enough nonsense at The Vintage Toy Advertiser as it is. And may I remind you, the last time this happened we ended up crashing into the darkside of Planet Jupiter!”
“Stop moaning,” said the cat. “And post up the ads!”
INSERT TIME TRAVEL NOISE HERE: Whooooooooshhhhhhhh…
(six minutes later)
Wooof just came skying into the flanning room in a plate of static.
“Trots the wubble?” I said.
“I maccidently assed up the settings on our new wine machine,” replied the cat. “We have less than six biscuits before time tits into sploo, erases our decent roasts, and the bailiffs come to bake our spanner! In addition to this, we’ll be talking in noonerisms and sponsense.”
“Hoody bell Wooof!” I said. “We already talk enough nonsense at The Toasted Sandwich Advertiser as it is. And ray I me-mind you, the last time this happened we ended up crashing into the backside of Janet Plutiter!”
“Mop stoning,” said the cat. “And toast up the pads!”
TVTA is proud to present a tantalising mixed-up time treat of inflatable bunnies, scarecrows, rollerskates, kangaRoos, monsters and spooks, and more inflatables!
It’s clean up time!
Toxic Crusaders is a 1990s animated TV series based on The Toxic Avengers films. Main character Toxie is a grotesque mutant endowed with superhuman powers, who along with allies like No-zone and Major Disaster battle against villains Czar Zosta, Dr. Killemoff, Bonehead and others. Tie-ins include a Marvel comic book run, an action figure toy line and video games.
TVTA has managed to get its hands on these three terrifically toxic ads from Denmark! Big thanks to Jaltesorensen for sharing the images.
And this next one, very roughly translated as:
“A NEW super hero, raging in your city now”
TOXIE: Good day to all our millions of Toxic-fans!
KID: I don’t know which smells worse… Him or my diaper!
A REAL AMERICAN HERO
G.I. Joe is a line of action figures produced by Hasbro. The original 1964 line featured 12 inch figures. In 1982 the brand was relaunched in a 3¾-inch scale along with vehicles, play-sets and accessories. As well as action figures, G.I. Joe had its own comic book and an animated TV series. The brand also appeared on numerous video game titles and products such as posters, games and clothing.
“From the planet Zero come the incredible workers of the future – grabbing, pinching, clawing, carrying, attracting, throwing, pushing, pulling and hauling. From turret to track they are realistically simulated in awesome detail.”
I love how in 1972 the Ideal toy company was using the word “awesome” to describe one of its products – awesome being a word heavily in use today to describe… well… awesome things. Things like toy robots. Things like Zeroids!
Zeroids was a line of battery-operated motorised robots able to propel themselves across surfaces. They appeared on toy shelves in 1967 and underwent a rebrand in the late 70s and more recently in 2016 by the Toyfinity company. The original robot characters in the line are Zobor the Bronze Transporter, Zintar the Silver Explorer, and Zerak the Blue Destroyer.
The Revell and Monogram brands were born back in 1945, both on different paths: Revell started out with plastic toys (one of their first was a Toy Washing Machine), while Monogram was making model kits (originally from balsa wood). Over the years that followed Revell and Monogram – once fierce competitors – joined together as one company and to date continue to enjoy that partnership.
Adapted from the official site: revell.com
Check out TVTA’s entry on Monogram too! Monogram