About The Vintage Toy Advertiser

Love late 20th Century pop culture? You’ll love it here :) TVTA’s mission is to digitally showcase as much vintage advertising as it can get its ink-stained fingers on: from toys, to film, to music, to comics, video games, fashion, food, drink and household goods and much more. TVTA began life in 2010 as a French blog documenting French toy adverts. In 2011 the site moved to its current WordPress home and expanded to include international adverts, catalogues and posters that went beyond toys. Today the site is an ad-free, non-revenue platform aiming to serve as an excellent digital archive and resource. TVTA loves: books, magazines, comics, film, poems, music, photography, art and design, Halloween, Horror, drums and percussion, peace, love, nature, fairies, the stars and space, nonsense, silliness, and of course... vintage toys! Thanks for stopping by :)

My Dog Has Fleas! Ideal toy shop catalogue, 1980s, France

My Dog Has Fleas (Sacapuce) game from Ideal.

Featured are some instantly recognisable toys and games which were available worldwide throughout the 1980s, as sold by the Ideal company. Some of the toys had already been around for a while – like Buckaroo (1970) and KerPlunk (1967). I had both of these, plus a Rubik’s Cube, and one of my brothers had the TCR ‘Super Trucks’ racing track set.

The images are from an Ideal company catalogue which would have originally been distributed to toy shops throughout France, then handed out to customers by the shop owner. Exact date is unknown.

Cover. Ideal toy shop catalogue. 1980s. France. Rubiks Master Cube.

1980s Rubik’s Cube puzzles from Ideal.

Buckaroo ‘Bourico’ from Ideal.

KerPlunk ‘Plunk’ or ‘Crash Plunk’ from Ideal.



TCR – Total Control Racing!

TCR Super Camions. Ideal.


TCR – The Dukes of Hazzard / Starsky and Hutch ball of confusion!

 

Question:

What is strange about the following The Dukes of Hazzard TCR advert?

TCR ‘Starsky and Hutch’. Ideal.

Answer:

Oops, they made an error in listing The Dukes of Hazzard as Starsky and Hutch

Sharp-eyed readers will also notice an alternative roof design of the General Lee vehicle, as well as the incorrect appearance of the number ’11’ instead of the correct ’01’.

Detail. TCR Dukes of Hazzard / Starsky and Hutch catalogue listing error.

This mishap wasn’t just limited to a French Ideal catalogue entry…

… an actual box version was released in France with the same errors!

Starsky and Hutch / The Dukes Of Hazzard error production box. Image courtesy of Lulu-Berlu.

Starsky and Hutch / The Dukes Of Hazzard error production box. Image courtesy of Lulu-Berlu.


That’s all for now vintage mates...

Thank you for mixing up your franchises and de-flea-ing the dog with us 🙂

Coming soon… toy products from the Ertl company, plus more TVTA Halloween party teasers! 🎃🎃🎃

Halloween’s coming!

Swamp Thing movie. US. 1982

Not long now, dear readers, as TVTA crawls from its editorial swamp in time for one of its favourite events of the year… Halloween!  And this year I have something special in store… something a bit different than my usual fare of gruesome printed matter…

Clues:

They may only be short, but they’re long on scares… Something fiendish to digest before falling asleep… Grisly brush strokes… Thirteen (unlucky for some?)… Fifty (50-50 chance of survival?)

All will be revealed on All Hallows’ Eve!

Samhain is coming! 😈💀👻🎃🎃🎃

Meccano Magazine 1958

Cover of Meccano Magazine N°10, 1958, France.

Following on from my previous post about Frank Hornby’s Meccano toys, here is a Meccano enthusiast magazine sold in France in 1958.

The magazine features Meccano related news items, reports on aviation, space exploration, sports, science, competitions, a Dinky Toys Club Journal page, and some wonderful 1950s toy ads.

Below are selected scans.

Meccano kit and aeroplane. Meccano Magazine N°10 1958. France.

Hornby trains. Meccano Magazine N°10 1958. France.

Dinky Toys. Meccano Magazine N°10 1958. France.

Tour du Monde en Vespa board game (World tour by Vespa). Meccano Magazine N°10 1958. France.

Detail of Tour du Monde en Vespa board game (World tour by Vespa).



TVTA bonus!

Staying in a Meccano mood…

I helped my youngest son build a mini Meccano aeroplane over the weekend. Here are some pics from start to finish. For a toy so tiny and fiddly to put together, it looks pretty cool when all is done, with rolling wheels and a propeller that can turn.

Meccano Bolts.



Meccano Bolts. Avion.


Thanks for looking! 🙂

Coming soon… ideal toys, or toys from Ideal?

Meccano toy catalogue, France, 1972

Front cover for the Meccano S.A. Catalogue Général, 1972, France, showing the new blue and yellow parts colour system.

Originally called ‘Mechanics Made Easy’, Meccano is a popular and enduring toy construction set invented in 1901 by Frank Hornby from Liverpool, England. Due to its huge success and demand, Hornby opened factories around the world, one of which features in today’s post – the Bobigny factory in France, which in 1951 was producing more than half a million Meccano box sets a day! 

The following 1972 general catalogue shows the new blue and yellow parts that had become available for Meccano sets, as well as ‘Pocket Meccano’  and  ‘Meccano Plastic’.

The catalogue also features other iconic toys to come from the French Bobigny factory such as Scalextric racing, Hornby model trains, and Spirograph. The final page of the catalogue shows a photograph of the Bobigny factory. One can only imagine the amount of toys that passed through the gates during its tenure as one of Frank Hornby’s wordwide factories! 

Meccano complimentary sets. 1972.

Pocket Meccano sets. 1972.

Meccano motors. 1972.

Meccano sets. 1972.

Meccano Plastic. 1972.


Other toys shown in the catalogue


Spirograph sets: Spirojunior, Spirostart, Spiro-matic. 1972.


Meccano mini projectors Walt Disney range. 1972.


Meccano Chip Away, Pant’ O’ Mime, Tele & Col. 1972.


Meccano Spiroscope, Junior Jet, Western. 1972.


Jouets enfance. 1972.


Gyrojet

Meccano SA Catalogue 1972. Rear cover. Gyrojet.

Meccano Gyrojet. 1972.


Scalextric


Scalextric. 1972.

Scalextric. 1972.

Scalextric. 1972.


Hornby-AcHO trains


 


Frog model kits



The Meccano factory, Bobigny, France, 1972


Meccano factory, Bobigny, France, 1972.


Thanks for looking 🙂

All images scanned by TVTA from the Meccano catalogue général, 1972, France.

Other sources: Meccano France

Homework assignment: building a better robot

We can do it!

Gerry Anderson Andromedan Warbot. 1979. UK.

Starlog Japan. 1981. Maximilian.

Magic Robot Quiz Game. 1983. UK.

Hulk: Baptism of Fire. John Byrne. 1986. US.

September was pretty cool. It was my birthday, and I was pleased to get Kim Wilde’s last album Here Come The Aliens after seeing Kim and her band live in concert in July. The album is ridiculously addictive, with every single one of its pop/rock/80’s-vibe songs staying in your head long after listening.

Kim Wilde Here Come The Aliens 2018 CD. Artwork by Scarlett Wilde.

I also got The Desaturating Seven CD by Primus, a concept album based on the children’s book The Rainbow Goblins, written by Italian author and artist Ul de Rico. For those who don’t know, Primus is an amazing funk/metal/progressive rock band, recording since 1989, and who composed the original TV theme music to South Park. Primus sucks 🙂

Primus The Desaturating Seven CD

In September I had a story published…

My short story The Shores We Scavenge was published in a print anthology called Secrets in the Water. This is the fourth short I’ve had published to date, as well as a fair bit of poetry. It’s my dream to publish a full length novel… something I’m working on. In the meantime, short stuff is wonderful 🙂

Detective Comics N°1000!

Finally got a copy of the landmark Batman issue, and with a very cool variant cover. Thanks to a good friend in the UK who sent this over.

Detective Comics N° 1000. May 2019. Jim Lee / Scott Williams / Alex Sinclair cover.

Pez love. Love Pez!

Plus two little Smurfs I needed to complete a Kinder Surprise Chocolate Egg collection that I’ve been putting together – look out for an upcoming post all about that! 

Robots…

They can spin!

Shogun Rocket Tops. 1979. Italy.

Robots can attack and compute! 

ATTACKING MARTIAN, battery operated tinplate robot, by Horikawa, Jaman, 1960s. ANSWERGAME, battery operated tinplate robot that executes simple mathematics, by Ichida, Japan, 1960s. From Christie’s South Kensington auction catalogue. 1988.

Robots can talk!

Power Rangers Robot Ranger. 1995. France.

All in all, September was a great month. Thanks for looking (back) with me, and remembering to love your robot  🙂


Poem:

A Quick Digital Lesson

A+ plus a teacher, Teacher-Teacher, back row cheater, front row swot (I’m a girly, girly swot and I don’t care), digital faces preach to reach, upturned calculators, speak and spell, red LCD warnings readable only in reflections, reflections of the mind and soul, hearts chopped up for lunch on a mirror, believing in youth because you’re no different and it hurts just the same and it always will, you, hey you, it’s you because… the song and the dance and the early morning impressions, lessons, torn-open depressions, bleeding hearts and knife-twisting regressions, dreams that violate night after night when you should be sleeping and resting oh my poor dear one, you, you who deserve divine and pure realignment while preparing for your homework assignment, history, history, history, repeat after me: honestly now, if you could go back and change things, would you? Would you take a shiny merit, a prefect badge, 10 points for Slytherin or Gryffindor, detention or lines, the walk of shame to the headmaster’s office – he’ll burn your books and make an example of you in morning assembly in front of the school, idiot, dunce, waster, fool, words so cruel whether said verbally or spelled out on the latest computer or the shiniest screen of the shiniest phone, yes there are Apps for that – they bring you down the moment you soar, are free to use with personalised ads, harvesting away while you study and learn in the digital school where you’re a number not a name, but then… hasn’t that always been the same even when analogue was queen for a day, along with paper and poems and song and word of mouth, and painted cave walls and the primordial grunt? Bell rings. Ring-a-ling-a-ling. Lesson over for today. School’s out. Freedom beckons but only ever of sorts… yet… listen… do you want to know an organic secret straight from the human heart and soul? My digital master, he loves it when I sleep, because he believes he can read my dreams. What he does not know is that I only ever dream in colour.


 

I’ve been treffing

I like to tref… There, at last, I’ve said it. Truth is, I’m a bit of a trefologist, and I follow trefology because I am interested in learning about life.

If you haven’t yet treffed then I wholeheartedly recommend you do. To find out more about the wonderful world of trefology, get yourself over to fellow WP blog site trefology and follow the fun. You won’t regret it.

An ant story

I.

I wanted to capture ants

Not just any ants, but special ants who wear velvet slippers

So I sprinkled sugar over my terrace to act as bait

And soon a colony of ants in velvet slippers arrived to feast

But then came anteaters in moccasins, who gobbled up the ants

Followed by coyotes in ballet shoes, who ate the anteaters

Followed then by mountain lions in hiking boots, who ate the coyotes

Followed by pandas in clogs from Amsterdam, who ate the mountain lions

By evening my terrace resembled some apocalyptic wasteland of bones and shoes, and I was forced to call the police on the surviving pandas, who were staring at me hungrily

When the police finally came, they ate the pandas, plus their clogs, plus all the other shoes left on my terrace, and then they promptly left, complaining of indigestion

Which is a rookie detective mistake to make – eating such a tough meal as all that while responding to an incident…

So, I dedicate my new book to those hungry police officers: Eats pandas, shoes, and leaves.


II.

If the Very Hungry Caterpillar had been gobbled up by a tree snake at the beginning of its quest to eat, then thousands upon thousands of books might have been spared from the indignity of being sold with holes in their pages.


III.

The following print adverts may become more relevant when you start learning trefology. Only you can discover!


Thank you for wearing shoes and dining with us 😍🍕🥨🍰🍭🍺🍷🍴🥄🥢


With thanks to Lynne Truss, Eric Carle, and trefology.

Words by the editor. Images from the collection of TVTA. ‘learn life learn trefology’ flyer by trefology.

The Prize of the Cat: Wooof’s missing pony from 1979!


A TVTA Short Story Mystery Special !! 


WHSmith Pony competition Look-In N°15 1979 UK


Our intrepid office cat Wooof reckons that in 1979 he won a pony in a W.H. Smith ‘outdoors’ competition, and that W.H. Smith cheated him out of his prize by deliberately misplacing ‘Bess’ at the Bull Ring Shopping Centre in Birmingham, England (Wooof told me he had already named the pony ‘Bess’ even before the ink had dried on his entry form, such was his confidence in winning!).

“I vote we crank up the TVTA time machine and go back to 1979 Birmingham to find out what happened,” said Wooof.

“Right now?” I replied. “I haven’t finished scanning those vintage egg-cosy knitwear patterns Mrs Coldkettle the tea lady donated.”

“Forget fashion accessories for boiled eggs,” said the cat. “We need to find Bess!”

CUT TO:


** TEN MINUTES LATER ** DIAL SET TO 1979, BIRMINGHAM BULL RING SHOPPING CENTRE ** SOUNDS OF TVTA TIME MACHINE WARP-WHOOSHING!! **


1979!!!

Crivens! Wooof and I arrived in 1979 Birmingham to absolute mayhem… flipping dinosaurs everywhere!! Funny, I don’t remember dinosaurs being around in 1979 in the West Midlands… Gah! Worse was that one of the vicious beasts, a T-Rex no less, had captured our missing nag and was about to make a pony sandwich out of her! Poor Bess!

“NOOOOOOooooooo!!!!” cried Wooof.

“It’s okay Wooof,” I said. “I don’t think that’s actually Bess in the jaws of that mad dinosaur… look closely… the poor creature is a fully-grown horse… whereas Bess is a mere pony and has WHSmith gift tags attached her!”

“Thank goodness for that!” said Wooof. “So, tell me, if the dinosaur doesn’t have Bess, who does?”

“A simple process of elimination will have us arriving at a satisfactory answer in no time at all,” I replied.

“I’m all ears,” said Wooof. “Who’s the culprit?”

Elvis Costello!”

Wooof frowned. “No way. Elvis Costello would never stoop so low as to rustle a pony!”

“Alright, fine, if not Elvis, how about the TV versions of Doctor Strange, Spider-Man, and the Incredible Hulk?”

“That’s just sick!” said the cat. “Superheroes are sworn to protect all ponies!”

“Even the TV superhero ones?”

“TV ones especially! There was no one else to look up to back in their day.”

“Maybe TV Hulk accidently stepped on Bess?”

“Are you serious?”

“Sometimes.”

“Next you’ll be accusing Captain Kirk!”

“Don’t be daft,” I said. “But maybe, just maybe… Spock has Bess!”

“Spock doesn’t have Bess,” sighed Wooof.

“Monkey?”

“Gahhhh! No,” said Wooof.

“Wonder Woman then?” said I.

“!!#!@!!! No!!!” cried the cat. This process of elimination is going to take ages!”


** SEVEN AND A HALF HOURS LATER **


Finally… I came up with a good solution to our dilemma…

“How about I call Spaceline?” I said.

“What in the name of holy cat biscuits is Spaceline?”

“It’s a recorded information line in 1984 that sometimes deals with time travel issues. All we have to do to access it is travel to 1984.”

“Well what are we waiting for!” said the cat, “Let’s hit 1984!”

CUT TO:


** DIAL SET FOR 1984 ** SEATBELTS FASTENED ** POWER FROCK SHOULDER PADS IN POSITION ** DURAN DURAN CASSETTES INSERTED INTO SONY WALKMANS ** SOUNDS OF TVTA TIME MACHINE WARP-WHOOSHING!! **


Wooof and I arrived in 1984 quicker than you can say ‘Big Brother is washing your Mullet.’ After several attempts we managed to locate a working red telephone box, and Wooof dropped a 10 Pence coin into the slot while I dialled the number on my print advert. We waited. Beep. Beep. Beep. ‘The time sponsored by Accurist is…’

Oops, wrong number. Try again…

We were eventually connected to a well-spoken female robot, and she said to us: “Welcome to Spaceline. You are speaking to Trinity9. How may I be of assistance?”

“We’re looking for my prize pony,” said Wooof. “Her name’s Bess…”  and he went on to explain the whole sorry story down the phoneline to Trinity9.

“I see,” said Trinity9. “So… you believe you were cheated out of a 1979 first prize pony by the competition organiser, and you suspect that this pony, who you named ‘Bess’, is currently located somewhere in a shopping centre in 1979 Birmingham, England?”

“Absotiffily!” said Wooof.”

“Liar!” said Trinity9, making Wooof jump. “There is no way you could have entered that competition in 1979… you weren’t even born!”

“I resent that undeniable fact!” said Wooof.

“He’s actually sixty-one in cat years,” I said.

“Your office cat is a big cheater!” said Trinity9.

“How dare you call me a cheetah!” exclaimed Wooof. ‘I’m a mixed breed Domestic Panther Tabby Green Nikto, if you must know!”

“He’s cross,” I said.

“I’m fuming!” said Wooof.

“We don’t appreciate these slurs,” I said.

“Too right,” agreed Wooof. “And I’ve been working hard on being appreciated!”

“Whatever,” replied Trinity9. “It doesn’t change the fact you manipulated your way into the past with the sole aim of winning a pony. This cat is a law breaker!”

“Operator, you’re crossing the line with these accusations,” I said.

“Mm.. actually, can you hold the line a moment…”

  • Please hold while you are connected to the next available agent.
  • For English press 1. Para Español presione el número 2.
  • Would you like to upgrade to our Elite Gold Viscount Emperor plan?
  • Your premium-rate call is important to us. Please continue to hold.
  • We’re sorry. All of our agents are busy. Please hang up and try again.

“Hello, Spaceline operator,” I said. “Trinity9, are you still there?”

“I’m still here.”

“What happened?”

“Nothing. I just put you on hold while I called the police.”

“Seriously? You called the police on us?”

“No. Not this time,” said Trinity9. “But think on… your cat cheated by secretly time-travelling to 1979 in order to win a pony. Just this very morning, he picked up an entry form from W.H. Smith… filled it in… posted it… then dashed back to the present time before you even had time to finish your breakfast! Cock-a-doodle-cornflakes!”

I turned to the cat. “Wooof, is this true?”

“I cannot lie,” replied Wooof. “I entered the competition this morning. I travelled back in time. I cheated. And I would have gotten away with it if it hadn’t been for that pesky Spaceline operator!”

“Wooof!” I cried. “Why? Why?!? You know our New Year’s Resolution this year was to stop cheating. Pfft. Failed once again… and we made it as far as October this year!!”

“Actually,” said the cat, “didn’t we, like, fail in February when you ‘accidently’ scanned 180 euros which you tried to pay the electricity bill with, and then we ended up…”

“Shhhhh! Not now, Wooof!” I hissed. “That was just an April Fool prank.”

“In February?”

“Ahem, ahem,” coughed Trinty9.

“Yes?”

“Talking of euros… it is my duty to inform you that your call so far has cost 50 euros in charges.”

“50 flippin euros!?!!”

“It’s a premium phone line, sir!”

“Well, for 50 euros you can at least tell us if Wooof won that perishing competition or not.”

“No, I’m afraid your cat didn’t win.”

“Not even the sailing holiday prize?” Wooof asked hopefully.

“No.”

“A Binatone TV?

“Nope.”

“The runner up prize of a camera?”

“No,” said Trinity9. “You won absolutely nothing. And good… serves you right for cheating!”

“Well that sucks massively,” said Wooof. “So how do you explain disappearing ponies called ‘Bess’ in the middle of Birmingham, shopping centres, dinosaurs on the loose, and all the other crazy things we haven’t even had time to mention yet?”

“I’m afraid your time-travelling shenanigans caused multiple time paradoxes,” said Trinty9. “Your competition cheating has damaged the very fabric of time.”

“Like the Butterfly Effect?” I said.

“More like the Bull-in-a-china-shop Effect,” replied Trinity9.

“Yes,” said Wooof. “We wondered why we saw dinosaurs in 1979 Birmingham. That really was stretching credibility to its absolute limits.”

“Yes,” I said, adding, “About as likely as finding King Kong in the Bullring Shopping Centre in 1972!”

“Ha, ha,” laughed Wooof. “Imagine that!”

“Ahem, ahem,” coughed Trinity9. “Sir, may I inform you that your call charge to Spaceline is about to exceed the 100 euro mark? This call is costing you and your cat a small fortune.”

“Wooof,” I said to the cat, handing him a shiny 50 Pence coin. “Nip to the nearest newsagent for two 10p mix-ups and a couple of comics, while I chat to the nice Spaceline operator.”

“Yippee!” cheered Wooof, leaving me alone in the phone box while he made for the nearest John Menzies.

John Menzies. Look In N°15. 1979. UK.

“So, what do you suggest I do?” I said to Trinity9. “I can’t possibly take Wooof back to the present time without some kind of pony prize… the poor cat will retreat into weeks of solitude and dark reflection, like how he did when he found out SpongeBob SquarePants wasn’t real.”

“I myself was equally shattered when I discovered Bob was only a cartoon,” replied Trinity9. “Didn’t sleep properly for days… and normally I’m a out-like-a-light-kind-of-robot-gal the moment my head hits the pillow…”

“Listen, Trinity9,” I said. “I’m not here to talk pillow talk… I’m here to kick missing first prize ass and chew nicotine replacement gum… and right now I’m all out of both! Come on, Spaceline lady robot buddy, help an editor out here… We can’t disappoint the cat! Fix it so that Wooof wins the pony, hm?”

“If you are suggesting I try and help you cheat in some way…” sniffed Trinity9.

“Not cheating…” I said, “Think of it more as bending the integrity of truth into a funny shape kind of thing… like those Bend ‘Ems toys, or Stretch Armstrong.”

“Or Play-Doh?”

“Yes! Absolutely! Do it for Play-Doh… think of the children!”

The phone went silent for an agonisingly long time.

Then: “Okay, Mr TVTA editor,” said Trinity9. “I have just the idea…”

“You do?”

“Oh boy do I!”

CUT TO:


** ONBOARD TVTA TIME MACHINE ** 1970s SWEETS AND COMICS BEING ENJOYED ** VERY HAPPY OFFICE CAT AND RELIEVED EDITOR ** DIAL SET FOR PRESENT TIME ** TVTA TIME MACHINE WARP-WHOOSHING!! **


“How do you like your new pony then?” I asked Wooof.

“She’s adorable,” replied the cat. “And you’re right… doing things the honest way is far more rewarding than cheating.”

“Correct,” I said. “Wooof, you know… cheating is never good… cheating is like…

[INSERT 4th wall break – brief lecture on the virtues of honesty vs cheating to get ahead, followed by back-slapping congratulations and manic laughter]

“Oh man! You are so right when you say all that!” agreed Wooof.

“Absolutely so. Now, tell me, old cat, what are you going to call your new pony?”

“I’m going to call her New Bess… In honour of Old Bess.”

“Wooof, that’s so thoughtful of you. Old Bess would be pleased to know you cared about her so much.”

“I miss her terribly,” said Wooof, gazing off into space, a sadness coming over him.

“I know, old cat. It’s going to take days to get over something like this.”

“Good thing I have my replacement pony then,” said Wooof, perking up a little.

“I admire your courage to move forward so quickly. Especially as it’s only been thirty minutes. Say, where is New Bess?”

“She’s right here,” said Wooof. “I just finished tidying her stables, and we’re all done with her grooming. Time for sugar cubes I think. New Bess…” Wooof called out to his pony… “Come to Wooof-daddy. It’s chow time!”

Enter:

New Bess

LATER…


TVTA EDITOR AND OFFICE CAT RELAXING IN FRONT OF LOG FIRE AT TVTA TOWERS ** COMICS, SLIPPERS, WARM MILK, G&T, PELICAN BEER, PIPE, VEGGIE CAT BISCUITS, PIZZA **


“What are you reading there?” I asked the cat.

He looked up from his vintage comic. “Catwoman,” he replied. “She’s my hero. But hey, I was just browsing some of the ads… and I was thinking of entering this, erm, competition thingy…”

“Hmmm… And what competition would that be?” I asked suspiciously.

“Oh, nothing too crazy.” Wooof handed me the comic, the page open to an advert… a competition… 1985…

“Wooof, no!!” I said, horrified.

“Come on… it’s only a quick trip to 1985… that’s just like yesterday man! And you know how much I’ve always wanted my own collection of art dinosaurs…”

“Absolutely no Wooof! No, no, no!!!!”


FIN


Story: TVTA

Images: scanned from the collection of TVTA

Dinosaur eating a horse comic strip images: Eagle, UK.

King Kong Bull Ring photo: Birminghammail.co.uk

Disco-claimer: No ponies or dinosaurs were harmed in this short story. Birmingham is a fictitious city and any resemblance to second cities in the UK either alive or dead is pure hearsay. No competitions were entered into illegally. W. H. Smith please don’t sue us… the above short story you have just read has been deep faked into the electronic pages of TVTA without our permission and there is absolutely nothing we can do about it. Please help save TVTA immediately by donating cryptocurrency or sending hard cash in an envelope. We also accept diamonds, speedboats, Duran Duran tapes, pizza, cake, and cameo roles in indie or big budget films. Thanks.