I’m linking up with Denise at Girlie On The Edge Blog, where she hosts Six Sentence Stories, and everyone is invited to write a story or poem constructed of six sentences based on a cue word given.
This week’s cue word is Eternal.
The hen that came down a beanstalk
Jack is dead, oh, eternal be his memory –
Yet I have no time for his eulogy, as I clamber down this bristling stalk,
Over leaves as long as surfboards, over beans as big as basketballs,
Down, down, to meet my new horizon which shimmers with a hope
That I may return to a coop of my own.
Down I climb to claim this liberty, but – curses – that ogre is after me;
Bigger than me, bolder, brasher, brawnier, broiling with anger and betrayal and
Bloodlust!
“Get back ‘ere!” the ogre screams.
Frightened, frantic, faster and faster down the beanstalk I scarper,
While above me the ogre booms down oaths of murderous revenge:
The rain is his sweat, the wind is his breath, thunderbolts his words,
Flies and mosquitoes his crumbs of bread…
Broken from the bones of Englishmen like Jack.
Down, down, about to touch the ground, and there at the foot of the beanstalk stands
Jack’s mother – her each axe-chop a strike for Jack (oh, eternal be his memory) …
Chop… chop… chop… and at last the beanstalk topples, and with it the ogre
Who breaks his neck as easily as once he broke his bread.
Jack’s mother, she scoops me up and cradles me with more love
Than I had ever thought possible could exist; and for this, tomorrow,
After resting, and mending my wings and bruised beak,
I will lay for her a golden egg, as she puts on black robes for the eternal memory
Of her son, brave Jack, who set me free from a castle in the sky.
Excellent! Love this, lots!
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Thanks, Resa 🙂
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Such imagery! Such energy! Such rhythm! Well executed!
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Hi Lisa, thanks so much for the good words! Hope all is well and safe with you and yours.
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I love the alliterative poetry of this Six, but also the use of the prompt word. It’s fascinating to me how the linked up stories are so different–and yet we both somehow stumbled across beans as a topic!
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Hi Kristi, thanks! Totally agree. Beans are trending this week! 🙂
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I agree with the above, aforementioned* Comments.
Don’t get me started on fairy tales! aka, to add insult to injury, bedtime stories.
(“What? You don’t think I can’t frighten my own children before they fall asleep? Thank you very much, Messrs. Grimm, Perrault, Andersen, I’ll handle the childhood trauma.” )
Damn! Where was I? oh, yeah… good Six.
Nice re-tell. (Hey, I’m not a poem guy, but I do spend an inordinate amount of my time, here at the SSS, trying to deconstruct the Sixes of others… search for rhetorical licks I can cop for a future story of my own. There’s a pattern to the verses, is there not? (In the interest of staying on topic, I’ll wait ’til later to look up the five-four-five pattern my brain seized on).
Actually, J&BS is one of the more innocuous of the fairy tales, at least imho. The guy makes a mistake, tries to correct his error and seeing an opportunity, trespasses on to some one else’s property… steals the guy’s asset, …uh and kills him, in the process of his escape.
(“Honey? Are the kids asleep yet? Get them up, I have the perfect lesson in successful participation in our culture! No, never mind, I’ll read to them in their sleep.”)
*sorry, holdover from a legal pastiche Comment, over at Lisa’s Six
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Hi Clark, thanks for the cool comment. I think the structure kind of found its own way after some splicing on my part, and fell into that tempo.
You’re spot on about Jack. He’s one of my least fave protaganists which is why I didn’t feature him as the escapee, and didn’t mention how he died – at least he perhaps redeemed himself by setting free the hen, who is the only victor I think in this retelling. (I was so tempted to have the enchanted harp as my escapee, but the hen won 🙂 )
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Damn, you know some words! Cheers to you and the wonderful Ladybird Books.
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Thank you! Seeing the covers of those old Ladybird Books sure bring back some memories. I still have a few from childhood, but none of the fairy tale ones unfortunately. The temptation to grab some online is strong!
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We found a few in random second hand shops in Australia but that might be harder in France. You can still support little shops by shopping online… Just a few? But maybe you’ll start a new collection …
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I haven’t seen any in France. They were British published and appeared in some commonwealth countries, especially the Peter and Jane reading series, which is why you found some in Aus maybe?
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I’ve always wwanted a goose that laid a golden egg, but I’m afraid of heights and would never climb the beanstalk! Good finish.
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Thanks, UP!
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Ah, a nice re-spin and a terrific walk down memory lane. Love thinking about all of those old stories.
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Thanks so much, Lisa, me too. When researching a picture for the SSS I came across the Ladybird Books version which I remembered reading as a kid. Then I saw the others like Beauty and the Beast, Rumplestiltskin, Puss in Boots – and the memories came rushing back, not just the stories but the wonderful illustrations!
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This is quite something–very unique!
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Thanks, Rhen. In some tellings of Jack and the Beanstalk it’s a hen which lays golden eggs, and in some some a goose. It was a tough decision to choose, and I went with survivor hen in the end 🙂
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Good for you 🙂
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Though I have summertime temps outside, reading this created sensations of a fireplace, crackling sounds of firewood, late evening wide open children eyes staring at the voice saying”faster and faster”…
You did it again my friend,(◠‿◕)
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Thanks my friend 🙂 Good to get the inspiration flowing again after work life consuming me lately. So liberating to create!
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Wonderful story telling. Love this tale of “re-telling” with its alliteration and fast pace.
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Thanks D, so happy to get some inspiration, time and energy to join in the fun that is SSS! 🙂
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Great wrapping up of one of my favorite stories from childhood!
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Thanks, Pat. Great to join in the SSS fun again!
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